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Showing posts from March, 2011

Ode to my second mom

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I have been wanting to write this blog for quiet sometime now. This is my humble tribute to an innocent, childlike, sweetly stubborn woman. Her name is Melrose and she used to be my Mother-in-Law. Amma passed away on January 12th this year. We never really shared the perfect saas-bahu relationship. Infact I hardly had the occasion to interact in length with her, in the first 3 years of my marriage. That was because, our's being a love marriage, the two of us chose to live separate, away from the rest of the family. This meant that whatever little time we spent together was on the weekly visits my husband and I made to her house. Even in that it was a sparse conversation. She would mumble a few words in Tamil and I would mumble back in Kannada. This wasn't because we were not fond of each other. We hardly knew each other to form an opinion. For me it was the hesitation of not being the bahu she chose coupled with the fact that I felt like an outsider, an intruder in that big f

Criticism and expectations

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Is what people think about you always different from what you think about yourself? Are you the biggest critique of yourself or are others? I guess it depends on the situation. Like women would criticize themselves the most when it comes to how they look in the mirror but would be defensive if someone were to comment on their skills as a mom.  I had a meeting with a client today and this blog is a result of that. Without getting into specifications, they told me we expect better from you because this is what you are known for. We come to you because you are recommended in this field. I started pondering and realized, all the while when I was thinking I was doing a good job, the other person was thinking she needs to be doing better than this!! What was good for me for not good enough for them. I guess it all boils down to expectations. When the expectations are high the outcome is expected to be higher. When that doesn't happen disappointment sets in. If your Manager thinks you ar